Monday, June 24, 2013

Discipline and Boundaries in Blended Families

Bright Family
A necessary part of being happy and healthy is having peace in the home.
No family is free from the occasional bickering and disagreements but when there is a firm foundation of respect, boundaries, love and understanding, a general feeling of peace and security can be achieved.
When two parents are blending their families together to create a new union, the road to serenity gets a whole lot bumpier. The rules are different with a blended family as opposed to a traditional one. This is especially true when it comes to discipline and consequences. There are many things that need to be taken into consideration.
Blurry Family
Family Gets Blurred
  • The natural parental bond
  • Underlined resentment
  • Undefined roles
  • Selfish emotional releases
  • The power struggle
  • Misdirected anger
  • The impact of the absent parent
The biggest hurdle that most blended families face is discipline. This is a huge hot button for many step-parents and when it is handled poorly, it can have irreversible consequences for the whole family.
Step-parents can be a huge gift, Every child can benefit from having another person in their life to love, support and encourage them! It is important to remember that the relationship will never be the same as it would if the adult was the biological parent however.
A marriage or union between two adults does not automatically transform into a parental bond between the adult and child. Once we decide to disassemble the traditional family and create a new version, we must also disassemble our idea of what those relationships need to look like.
There certainly needs to be boundaries established (for all) and a level of respect established but it is extremely important to resist the urge to pretend that any other adult can fill a natural parents roll.

The article below answers common step-parent discipline questions and gives insight to the important contribution step-parents can make.

Step Parents Discipline and Disagreements

In any family, the goal is always to live in harmony and peace while loving and supporting each other. Blended families are very common now, lets work together and help each other redefine the rules and how each person contributes to that family.
Our family structures have changed, the way we approach them should change as well.